![](https://cdn.uploads.micro.blog/32187/2021/19ba4ccbd7.jpg)
What I have lost … and what I have gained.
What I have lost … and what I have gained.
The single most disappointing aspect of my experience using Twitter was wanting to discuss ideas with folks and realizing nothing short of a kick-ass dog pic or a shot of their unboxed book would yield acknowledgement.
Can anyone guess the best way to derail a career in journalism?
Wait until after your pick up your English degree (minoring in Mass Communications ‘cause you were at the best damn journalism school one could hope for after all and just not showing up to class Freshman year at Georgia Tech, and initializing your collegiate transcript with a whopping 0.18 GPA, shouldn’t keep you out of Grady entirely)
Where was I … oh yeah … wait until after you graduate (the first time) to be diagnosed with dysthymia and ADHD.
Not sure which nose it was… but grade school ☾𐂂 would walk around on one wearing a shirt just like this.
Now I kinda want to pen an autobiography that not a one of you could possibly understand and call it My Ungrokkable Self
Perhaps I ought condition myself to give everyone the performance they’re looking for, like yesterday… and this morning. My ungrokkable self is tired of caring and a performance is the quickest way to pat them on the back and send them out smiling.
When you’re hanging out at Cali K9 waiting to be noticed, having arrived late (something you’ve done many times over the last 1 1/2 years you’ve been taking Kota there), when, finally, someone comes over to ask just the right questions. “You meant to be here? This your first class?”
“Nope, last.”
When you force her to read nonsense like this in a text because how the fuck else were you going to describe it: “Just sucks I have to rock my bog-sunken tires free from this tractionless hellscape in order to get moving again.”
When you remember keeping your parents address longer so you could continue voting against Newt Gingrich who was coming for your brother’s happiness.
Fresh armchair (couch, in honesty) theory: the aforementioned lateral thinking training, which leverages everything we detest about Lazy ADHD, installs the very neural pathways utilized by everything we celebrate about Creative ADHD. You can’t make darkness without light.
I wish I had done better at being a bridge between popularity and pocket protectors when I was in high school.
Wanna max out that Lateral Thinking attribute for your character’s latest build? Add some undiagnosed ADHD (27 years’ll do) and then try accruing fourty-fucking-something years pivoting out of any action your character ain’t in the mood for.
When you remember you failed whatever that stupid writing comprehension crap they make you do before officially signing off on your two-year core being satisfied in some American Universities (I remembered because I was recalling the last time you have to play 5¶ essay before becoming a real boy).
Reason #422 that I will not be your prototypical client:
Let’s say you’re my gym. You’ve been working with me for quite a while. You haven’t seen me for months (when the bottom drops out you become low priority). I finally decide to come back in today… 25 lbs lighter w/o 6.8% of my fat.
When you realize it’s been twenty years or so since you’ve had a friend’s phone number in your phone (or a friend for that matter).
When, now you’ve passed nearly as many years friendless as you have all friended up, you realize just what an unstoppable f$&king force you might prove to be should some spontaneous game of Balderdash ever overtake a room.
Y’all have no idea how f$&king draining being an enigma can be. So f$&king deflating to realize your neural network has plied its way into an algorithm configured in such a manner as to render your reality without a single soul available within to understand you or your perception.
Honestly, the philosophy major I was gonna be had I started at Oglethorpe instead of Tech would have been the most accurate.
If you’ve identified that annoying, repetitive ticking currently keeping you from settling into something, and the source happens to be the chaotic rush of CO₂ bubbles crying freedom before bursting against the aluminum can containing all those H₂O molecules who should be so lucky… U might be #ADHD
I keep thinking of things to say, thinking I'm gonna post said thing, realizing what I'm thinking of saying is mostly noise pollution, and losing all interest in whatever TF it was I almost said. Almost feels like flailing. Human connection deficiencies are kinda fucked.
When you realize you could totally use one of those social-media-content-creator-subscription thingies to make bank by allowing folks to subscribe to your account for access to all your content… of your dog… … …for access to all your content of your dog. #FML
Derailment Classification: Existential
Trigger: Any fresh, seemingly beneficial, potentially rewarding, idea (the fulfillment of such ideas being the clay bricks out of which one builds a life of satisfaction)
Nature of Derailment: Fleeting question
Fleeting Question: What's the fucking point?
Raise UR hand if U feel like turning yourself in2 a hermit 4 the better part of a decade (social net., pop. 2) while living on a neural cocktail that takes 1 part #ADHD, 1 part #Dysthymia & a pinch of #OCD could trick UR counselor in2 thinking U register on the #spectrum.
The kind of email I still ignore 'cause I feel my illustrated essays are more significant (and that eventually y'all will read them).
Dear Austin,
Apologies for not acknowledging your email sooner. The most helpful thing you could do for me right now would be to get Twitter support to remove the age-restriction labels slapped retroactively onto every tweet with a link, photo, or video from shortly before 5/5/21 to whichever day my original account manager's support ticket was closed and the labels stopped appearing.
I think it turns out that my superpower is mental modeling (no worries y'all, #ADHD and #Dysthymia keep a lid on my power, less than a handful can even recognize it).
F$$&&&&k … when you realize that properly expanding on the argument you want to make in the essay you're rewriting could also fill a book (and it wouldn't even mention the bifurcated information ecosystem). #ADHD
Kills me to feel like I have the framework in my head of something that ought be discussed in universities and I can't garner enough engagement to negotiate its release from ADHD captivity. Probably why the one-liner likes inspire spite.